geckos are gucky!!!

i know it's pretty lame that i'm blogging once again about geckos...and that it's laughable that i'm so scared of things that are so small and harmless...BUT...seriously...they're EVERYWHERE and they FREAK me out!!! they have these neck things that go in and out...and they chirp...and someone told me today that they JUMP!!!

i thought i had come to some sort of understanding with the gecko that lives at the bottom of the stairs...when he sees me coming, he runs and hides. but apparently the terrible thunderstorm that blew through last night destroyed his habitat and now he's taken to living on the steps and does not have the good sense to run and hide anymore...i've seen him four times since yesterday...AND he has a girlfriend...well, i'm assuming it's his girlfriend...she's smaller and a different color than he is...i would google it, but i'm just not that interested. whoever she is...she needs to find a new place to live and take her boyfriend with her!!! it's almost to the point of agorophobia...the phobia that won't let you leave your house because you're scared of the outside. i'm ridiculous...i know...

on a completely different subject...

most if not all know that matt and i are trying to get pregnant...we've finally come to the point where we know we're going to have to have help from doctors...something we're still trying to get comfortable with...and i've been praying about it...God, if You're okay with us getting help from doctors i really need some sort of sign/confirmation that it's okay to head in that direction.

most if not all know that i am married to...i cannot think of a nicer way to say this...the cheapest man i've ever met. (insert smiley face here) and cost/money has been one of the biggest considerations/obstacles to us getting help from doctors. last year, i spent some time investigating how much our insurance company would cover for the procedure that doctors are recommending we try. as of last year, the coverage was 80/20...they pay 80, we pay 20...which is wonderful and not the norm...most fertility procedures aren't covered at all.

so, the other day i decided to check again...because we're thinking of moving in the "help from doctors" direction and i wanted to make sure that i understood our insurance coverage amounts. and...BAM...there's my sign/my confirmation from God..."100% of eligible expenses for services rendered in the office". what?!! no 80/20...no deductible...just a co-pay and 100% coverage...i bawled like a baby because my God had given me the sign/confirmation i had asked for...how much does He love me?!! so, as i understand it...because the procedure we're going to try is a procedure performed in a doctor's office...we're covered 100%.

i've been wondering if the coverage amounts really changed from last year...or if i just didn't understand the coverage amounts in the first place...but ya'll, i swear they DID change and that GOD changed them...and it may not seem like a sign/confirmation from God...but i really think it is...i think it's just one more way that God is giving us peace about our decision. i'll take it.